DAMMIT! I just spent way too much effort and time trying to post about two incredible people that I met last month that completely changed my mind about immigration laws. I just lost the post before I could hit "submit" and it disappeared into the nether regions. It was going to be a very smart and heartfelt and epiphany-ridden goodie, but I'm too lazy to go back and try to remember any of it...so fuck it.

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Soooooo...instead...I'm just gonna do some miscalanius...miscilanious...miscalani...miscelanious.......whatever!.........."random".....brain dumps.

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Good Lord Almighty...that's me in the middle of that photo. 11 years old at Tremont, an environmental camp up in Cades Cove, Tennessee...flailing my hands around like I was dancing to the Madonna song "Vogue". When I look at this picture, I just think "How in the HELL didn't anyone, including myself, know I was gay???"

My 30th high school reunion is this September and a contact list with everyone's email got sent out last month. There are a lot of people on the list that I went to school with all the way from the 1st grade to the 12th grade. For the past few weeks, some of us have been building up and joining in on this hilarious string of emails back and forth with each other, talking about elementary school and scanning and sharing old photos.

Maybe I have some bizarre needy need for continuity and connection, but I am totally digging the fact that I am still in touch with a group of friends that I had when I was seven years old. Our parents sat together while they registered us for first grade and then sat together again to watch us graduate high school. hmmm

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Random thing #2

I went to go look at a warehouse up in the north end of Atlanta this afternoon...where the bedroom communities butt up against the city limits...where I75 and I85 and I20 meet and compete and cause grief and mayhem for commuters. I read last month that we have the third longest average commute in the US. How do humans deal with that shit everyday??? After just one afternoon sitting in that traffic, I was ready to commit suicide.

I did; however, have the two hours that it took to travel two miles to discover 89.3... an awesome new neo-soul station, so I just grooved and lived.

T

...and go easy on the Ecstasy and Amyl Nitrate...your angina will flare up...and oh oh, try the stuffed peppers at Sawiki's...they are to die for.



"Troll" is a term in the gay vernacular that means "old guy". To me, the term "troll" always meant someone at least ten years older than me at any given time, but now I'm coming to embrace my own "troll-hood" and frankly I'm cool with it.

I suppose there are several stages and rites of passage involved in becoming a troll...you know, little tell tale signs that you are becoming a troll...

A) Finding yourself one day dressing in a sweater and a smart pant to go to a dance club.

B) Talking way way too much about the food you just had at various places...as in saying "Oh my God, the stuffed peppers at Sawiki's are to die for"...or bemoaning the fact that "The fish at Levi's isn't the same since the new owners took over" (I've done that...give me 10 troll points)

C) Complaining about the "current retail price nowadays" of anything anywhere and comparing it to the the retail price you remember paying years ago...as in "Why, when I was your age, we got a good quarter bag of Columbian for thirty five dollars...then you pause and repeat "Columbian" loudly, then pause and repeat "for thirty five dollars" equally loudly just to reiterate. (I've done that too...I'll take 25 troll points)

D) Finding yourself in a gay piano bar singing along with the show tunes...outloud...and not just sarcastically either. (This is worth 15 troll points, 35 if the gay piano bar is located in the back of a strip mall in the suburbs...but just give me 5 points, because I think I may have done this, but I'm not sure)

E) Sitting in the barber/stylist's chair thinking maybe you'll go for a "young" haircut...5 points. Actually saying "Give me a young haircut" out loud to the barber/stylist...75 points.

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This is an old song on the new Pink Martini album "Hey Eugene" that we have been playing in the store. It seems as though the only people that remember it are gay guys approximately the same age as I am. I like to put it on when 40 something gay men come in and watch to see if they start singing along really loudly and way too joyfully with it.


I love to go a-wandering,
Along the mountain track,
And as I go, I love to sing,
My knapsack on my back.

Chorus:
Val-de-ri--Val-de-ra-
Val-de-ri--Val-de ra ha ha ha ha ha ha
Val-de-ri--Val-de-ra.
My knapsack on my back.

I love to wander by the stream
That dances in the sun,
So joyously it calls to me,
"Come! Join my happy song!"

Chorus:
Val-de-ri--Val-de-ra-
Val-de-ri--Val-de ra ha ha ha ha ha ha
Val-de-ri--Val-de-ra.
My knapsack on my back.

I wave my hat to all I meet,
And they wave back to me,
And blackbirds call so loud and sweet
From ev'ry green-wood tree.

Chorus:
Val-de-ri--Val-de-ra-
Val-de-ri--Val-de ra ha ha ha ha ha ha
Val-de-ri--Val-de-ra.
My knapsack on my back.

High overhead, the skylarks wing,
They never rest at home,
But just like me, they love to sing,
As o'er the world we roam.

Chorus:
Val-de-ri--Val-de-ra-
Val-de-ri--Val-de ra ha ha ha ha ha ha
Val-de-ri--Val-de-ra.
My knapsack on my back.

Oh, may I go a-wandering
Until the day I die!
Oh may I always laugh and sing
Beneath God's clear blue sky!

Chorus:
Val-de-ri--Val-de-ra-
Val-de-ri--Val-de ra ha ha ha ha ha ha
Val-de-ri--Val-de-ra.
My knapsack on my back.



T

See...that's why I should never open up You Tube. For the most part, all I ever do is look for new Ab Fab videos. Man...I loved that show.

I went to work with my friend Tim in 1998. He owned 3 stores and wanted to grow into a chain. Well, we eventually opened 11 more stores in seven years.

After the 5th store, we decided that we needed a district manager to help us handle the stores. We hired another friend of ours with the right experience...blah blah blah... and we threw a little party for him.

After about three years, he told me that he almost didn't take the job after that party. He said that Tim and I reminded him of "the two ladies on Absolutely Fabulous" that night and he was scared.

I still love Tim and every now and then I miss working with him. I think back now and realize...especially after watching them interact in the second clip...that we actually WERE like Patsy and Eddie from Ab Fab a great deal of the time. Sometimes, I miss that and I really miss Tim, but I don't miss the rigors and insanity of that company. Tim and I worked our asses off and partied our asses off non-stop for seven years. Looking back, I can't remember if we ever slept. Insanity.

Here's a clip from my all-time favorite episode of Ab Fab...where Patsy and Eddie "vacation" in France....



These are some bloopers from the episode "Gay Marriage". This one kills me. It gets funnier and funnier...



This one is of the TV evangalist character that Mo Gaffney played on the show. I've seen this scene 100 times, and it still makes me almost pee in my pants. When she startes screaming and quoting from Ephedrines 12:07 and rolling around on the floor...I always lose it. ...



T

I really don't know all that much about Rinocerose and I'm too lazy to google them right now. All I know is...

A) They are French
B) When you spell the name of their band correctly, you have to use 4 funky diacritical marks
C) The guy is kinda hot
D) They infuse a lot of awesome gee-tars into their electronica.
E) I fell in love with them when I got to witness them RAISING THE ROOF at a club in Ybor City in Tampa a few years ago.

This song is from their album "Installation Sonore". I don't think that CD left my player for 3 months.



(Just a little bitch here: This tune plays in full at Imeem, but when you imbed it, it only plays a 30 second version. That sucks. This tune is HOT.)

http://androus.imeem.com/music/RA6L3Uer/323_secondes_de_musique_rptitive_avec_guitare_espagnole/

Let's see if you can identify the 10 year old Biggie T in this photo. I haven't really changed much.

T