So I have been tagged by my sisters Belle and Polar B. Yall know my affection for these two fine ladies, so I'm gonna do this. I really thought about this and some of my answers might not be pretty.

The gist of the tag is to list 5 things you have heard that you will never forget.

1) "We don't have the same father you know. Dad was impotent. My father was a coach at City High and your father was a radiologist from Nashville" ...spoken by my older brother while we were in the car behind the hearse at my mom's funeral. (Well...uh...I didn't KNOW this...not until that moment)

2) "Does the ocean really "roar"?" ...spoken by my 5th grade English teacher. I can pinpoint that as the first time that I started questioning everything and not accepting the "face value" of anything. (Mrs. York...maybe you had an idea what those words sparked in a young mind...but maybe you didn't. I'll never be able to repay you for the simple wisdom of those 5 words.)

3) "And you're not alone" ...a line from David Bowie's song Rock and Roll Suicide on the Ziggy album. I was 16 years old and in the dark of my bedroom and I played this song over and over and over again.

4) "You are talking like a queer" ...I was 12 years old and I got the brilliant idea from the back cover of a comic book to send off to get samples to sell Christmas cards door to door. I wanted to make enough money to buy a cassette player. I went to my best friend's house first. His sister answered the door and that's all she said to me. I didn't cry, but I did walk to the creek down the street from their house...threw the stupid Christmas card samples into the creek and watched them float downstream. I filled up the box they came in with crabapples and went back and busted out all the back windows of their house.

5) I heard the Dharma read by a Buddhist monk in Blue Ridge, Georgia when I was 35. I also probably heard the phrase "look for Jesus on the road" about the same time. Life begins at 35...at least it did for me.

You are only allowed to pick one. Which shall it be?

1)...

B)...

Pi)...

E=mc2)...

Quatre)...

VI)...

32B)...

or 5)...
.
.
.
Remember, you can only pick one.

I have these two customers that have this ritual. Every Thursday night, they eat at the Vietnamese restaurant down the block and shop in the store. They always come in around closing and now that we are staying open until 10pm, they hang out and chat more.

They like to buy the new CDs I stock and they like to talk about them. They have given me some suggestions for some cool titles to carry. Tonight they suggested that I get some titles from a French DJ that puts out remixes of old 80s stuff. The series is called "Nouvelle Vague". I told them I hated 80's music and they lambasted me.

We stood there and ran down some albums from the 80s that actually were very very good. The first one they mentioned was "Upstairs at Eric's" by Yaz...and I started remembering. Now THAT was an incredible album. There WAS some great music then, actually. We talked about a few and then I was thinking about some more as I was driving home.

Here's my list of the ones I think were exceptional. These are the ones I loved back then.

1) Yaz - Upstairs at Eric's
2) Beastie Boys - Licensed To Ill
3) Paul Simon - Graceland
4) The Pretenders - The Pretenders
5) Elvis Costello - Get Happy
6) The Cure - Boys Don't Cry
7) The English Beat - I Just Can't Stop It
8) X - Wild Gift
9) Siouxsie and the Banshees - Juju
10) The Police - Ghost in the Machine
11) ZZ Top - Eliminator
12) U2 - War
13) REM - Murmer
14) Talking Heads - Stop Making Sense
15) The Smiths - Meat is Murder
16) The Blasters - The Blasters
17) Joy Division - Closer
18) Orchestral Manoeuvers in the Dark (OMD)- Orchestral Manoeuvers in the Dark (Randy reminded about this jewel)

Who am I leaving out?

"Situation" by Yaz... reminds me of every club I walked into in the 80s.

This has got to be the COOLEST product I have seen in a long time. It's the Edge Brownie Pan from Bakers Edge. www.bakersedge.com

The idea is to allow you to bake a batch of brownies that all have at least two yummy edges. The edge pieces are always the best. This product is freakin' genius. I am totally getting one of these.

This is from the company...

"Two delicious, chewy edges on every individual serving
Patented sidewalls circulate heat evenly throughout the pan

Better performance (fewer undercooked middles and burned edges)

Sized to fit box mixes and recipes for 9”x9” or 9”x13” pans

Premium nonstick coating and round, easy-to-clean corners

Durable heavy-gauge cast aluminum construction

Recessed handles allow pan to be gripped when turned upside-down

Custom spatula and recipes/instructions insert included"

...I submit...THE FENCE

Foreboding and aesthetically un-nerving, disturbing, and just so wrong. Much better suited for a front yard in El Salvador or Serbia...NOT the placid and increasingly more tastefully and artistically well landscaped front yard of a cute 100 year old bungalow in the quaint, "transitional" Edgewood neighborhood, here in sunny intown Atlanta, Georgia, US of A.

State's exhibit #1...THE FENCE in March, 2005...



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Di-di-di-dit-di-di-di-di-dit....NEWS BREAK: A new study just released today by the Baptist watchdog group, Dinem and Dunkem. The not-for-profit agency has been monitoring the Gay Agenda since 1974 and has uncovered a sly tactic that these deviants have been utilizing for decades right under the noses of the American family.

The study shows (a full transcript is available at www.dinemanddunkem.com for $29.95) that male and female homosexuals have been buying homes in "challenged and undesirable" inner city neighborhoods for 3 decades. Their evil plan; as it seems, is to blend in for a few years...then slowly increase the property value through subtle changes and up-grades, thereby upsetting the apple-cart of the demographics and property tax base of the neighborhood.

The foundation speculates that the homosexual then utilizes 85% of the monies derived from inflated home equities to fund various recruitment campaigns aimed at our youth. The remaining 15% is spent on 10 day vacations in Provincetown, Fire Island, or Key West.

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AAAnyways...Where was I? Oh yeah. If you look close enough at the above photograph, you will detect the amazingly flat ass of the typical male "urban pioneer" framed by the upper and lower right quandrant of the gate of the chain link fence surrounding his property.

The chain link FENCE served it's purpose well for 35 years, but I'm contemplating it's demise.

State's exhibit #2...THE FENCE in March, 2006...



It had, in it's day...served it's purpose. It saw the advent of early seventies prostitition and drug trafficking that drove a decent black family into the suburbs. As a boundry in the 1970s and 1980's, it kept the "peanut butter men" at bay. I am only going by what my neighbors tell me.

During the 1970s and 80s, the FENCE slowed down the Atlanta police, and the strange configuration and false west wall of our back bedroom closet guarded massive stockpiles of cocaine.

Then a muslim family bought the house in 1984 and raised one generation...one generation of muslims. A generation of devote and peaceful muslims...one generation of peaceful muslims, who for 20 years, daily felt that they were destined to hide behind this hateful chain link fence of southern bigotry and intolerace.

Shame on the FENCE.

Somehere along the line, the FENCE fucked up. The FENCE developed an identity crisis. "Is what I am trying to keep out really an enemy...am I really so noble? Is my exclusion actually exacerbating
the conflict?...Is it really possible that I am just an ugly 7 foot chain link fence perpectuating the intolerance?"..the FENCE wondered. But alas...the FENCE meant well. The FENCE tried to be the best FENCE it knew how to be. The FENCE didn't know any better.

Maybe the FENCE served it's purpose when the homeowner feared for his life and the lives of his family 20 years ago. Maybe the FENCE offered some comfort to the muslim family that felt threatend by the community 10 years ago. Maybe in 2007 I dig the fact that the dogs can run out and have the reign of the whole yard, thanks to the FENCE.

But...the FENCE is coming down this spring. It's a symbolic and aesthetic gesture I am willing to make. That was then...this is now.

Say it with me yall...

"CURB APPEAL"

How 2007 is that?
So very 2007.

Don't get me wrong.
I love 2007.

I love "I" before "E" except after "C"

But I also relish the exceptions to this.