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The Dog House


 Step Away From the Keyboard, Sir
 



"I always keep a supply of stimulant handy in case I see a snake--which I also keep handy."
W.C. Fields

Posted by Biggie T at 7:43 PM - 15 Comments   Add a Comment  
 
 Not So Fun Facts For Friday
 



Sorry for these decidedly un-fun facts, but here goes. The first five facts that come to mind that prove we are still un-evolved barbarians...

1) We still strike out against, torture, and murder humans that have found solace in faiths that contradict our own.

2) We still cavalierly impose judgement and channel hatred toward humans that inately love people that cannot breed with us.

3) We still slaughter innocent yet-to-be-born humans that are products of inconvenient, unwanted, complicated, or messy sexual liasons.

4) We still distrust, malign, peg, and patronize humans with pigments that differ from ours.

5) We still do not appreciate the sanctity of the spark and nurturing of fellow human creatures and the Godliness that exists inside every person that will draw the first breath of life exactly the way we all did, cries at the same things that makes all of us cry, laughs at the same things that makes all of us laugh, and shares the same ancestory that pulled us out of the muck in the first place.

We should be fucking ashamed of ourselves because of all of these.

Whew...ok..that's it. As you were. I promise to be funny tomorrow.


Posted by Biggie T at 12:47 AM - 20 Comments   Add a Comment  
 

 I Should Just Listen To My Gurus Tonight
 



On second thought, you know what?....I'll not yet even write the other blog I was going to throw down tonight. I've been dealing with stupid and blatantly bullshitting commercial real estate assholes (oops..there's that word, Whit) for the past two days in Nashville. What a sorry bunch of excuse for human redneck motherfuckers.

And oh yeah, I finally got to see Brokeback Mountain, courtesy of the movie service at the hotel when I got to my room around midnight.

During the 4 hour trip home in the car by myself, I just got more and more pissed about everything. I thought about the film and how intolerance and bigotry, and yes, the church ruined the lives of eight innocent characters in it...and got just fucking madder and madder about the fact that this shit does still happen in the real world in 2006. The more I processed it, the madder I got. That's the groundwork for the blog to come, once my head clears.

I even started getting pissed about other shit, from mundane to maddening. I was pissed passing through Manchester, TN thinking about how idiots like Adam Sandler and Britney Spears can actually be famous. I was pissed passing through Chattanooga, TN thinking about how Atlanta has banned leashed dogs from outdoor festivals. I was pissed about the oil companies blocking alternative energy resources and the pharmaceutical companies blocking real advancements in the fight against AIDS by the time I hit Dalton, GA. Random shit like that.

I walked in the door pissed about just about everything. Imagine what a joy I was to be around. I decided that this is not the appropriate time to thoughtfully blog about an extremely important issue, so.....

....I'm breaking out the good imported Czech beer, trolling to see if I can bum a hit of chronic from my neighbor, and am letting Real Rhapsody shuffle some noise from my gurus to help me get this mood off my chest and exorcise this state of mind.

My gurus tonight...

Henry Rollins
Charles Mingus
Miles Davis
Patti Smith
William S. Burroughs

Well, sir..I should be dandy in the mornin'. Late as shit to work, but dandy nonetheless. Peace, T.

*****Patti Smith "Pissing In A River"
The first line from her rendering of the song Gloria..."Jesus died for somebody's sins...but not mine" Yikes...that line always gives me pause.
Posted by Biggie T at 10:09 PM - 15 Comments   Add a Comment  
 

 Apocalypse...Not Now?...Ok...Whenever...God Knows I Don't Wanna Be A Botha!
 

Tuesday.....Forty-seven emails cascading when I hit send/receive. My voicemail filled up before 11:00. Messages on both cell phones. A constant parade of sweaty and overly jovial sales reps attempting to make the dreaded "cold call". I fear I may be going insane.

I am now building a fort, out of office supply and vendor sample boxes around my desk. I should be done soon and completely impervious to any outside stimuli. By 17:00, I will be ready to catapult Diet Coke and Mentos bombs through the top.

GH has opted to dress like Johnny Cash today in an effort to be stealthy and blend in with the servers, but when I peek over the boxes, I can still make out his profile as he waddles around the office.

 18:13...I am now making everyone in the office that approaches the fort make the "KRGH" sound when they want to make vocal contact with me (I don't know how the fuck to spell that noise that a military field radio makes when you start and end a transmission, but "KRGH" fits as well I can imagine)  Anyway...I am completely ignoring anyone that speaks to me without saying KRGH before and after their requests.

Posted by Biggie T at 2:44 PM - 31 Comments   Add a Comment  
 
 All Things Considered, I'd Rather Be In Guatemala
 

Puppy just made me start thinking about a trip I took to Guatemala two years ago. She has some sublime paintings posted over at Life With Schnauzers that look just like the courtyards of the oldest city in Central America, Antigua, Guatemala.

The company I work for has a partnership with a truly amazing non-profit organization called Aid To Artisans. Their website appears in my favorites list. Aid To Artisans sets up offices in countries that have been hit with natural or political disasters and strives to connect impoverished local artisans with a fair and favorable world market for their goods. If there are true angels in the world, these people are among them. This is no missionary bullshit. ATA helps equip real people in need with real skills to help them bring themselves into situations that allow them to feed and support themselves and their families.

I got to go with them to Central America to witness their efforts there in 2004. ATA was involved in several projects in various sites at the time that I got to visit.

In El Salvador, they were heading a re-training of farmers that had been growing coca for the cocaine trade, and teaching them how to profitably re-direct to grow and market indigo. San Salvador was spooky, but beautiful and very modern. Our guide went through the war there, and her stories of the bombings and disruptions of her schooling were bone chilling. All homes are gated and walled, and guards stood at every corner with rifles. This was a little disconcerting. In El Salvador, ATA was also assisting women from the remote mountains in marketing their amazing black pottery. The really sad thing about El Salvador to me was the fact that indigenous people were killed off by the thousands by the government in the 1920’s, and there are hardly any people left in the country with indigenous blood.

In Honduras, ATA was assisting in the training of ex-gang members, helping them connect with the elders in traditional wood, clay, and iron crafts. I stayed in a compound in the mountains of Tegucigalpa for 3 days when I was there. I can’t describe this place and do it any justice. In the jungle, with lush plant and animal life, and surrounded by the kindest and most genuine people in the world. None of the rooms in the compound had four walls…you were open to nature all the time. It was incredible and an amazing organic way to live.

I have to say my favorite country we visited was Guatemala, though. All I can say is this is as close to paradise as I can imagine. ATA’s concentration there was to help artisans that had been victims of earthquakes and landslides get back on their feet and connect with a fair world market again. Guatemala has a very large indigenous population and their art and crafts are in large influenced by their Mayan ancestry. Beautiful textiles and woodworks.

We spent a day’s side trip to Antigua, Guatemala…so I got to be just a tourist one day. Our guide, besides being as cute as shit, was funny and humble and hated Bush with a passion, so you can believe we hit it off big time. He loved his Guatemala and made the day one of the rewarding days I have ever had.

Antigua is the oldest city in Central America. It was founded in 1543. Situated at the foot of a massive volcano, this town just takes your breath away. Absolutely beautiful and haunting this place. The courtyard paintings on Puppy’s site look exactly like the ones in Antigua.

And hey…that beer they make down there, Gallo…well that is the best beer I have ever tasted. If you want to taste it here, they market it as “Rooster”, because of the trade conflicts, I suppose. I’ve been digging around in my old files and emails for the pics I took there and can’t find them, so here are some stock shots of Antigua….




Posted by Biggie T at 12:07 AM - 10 Comments   Add a Comment  
 
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  About Me
Author: Biggie T
From Atlanta, GA, USA
 
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